at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
