Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Randomize
