Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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