weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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