I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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