is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
