No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
either way he was missing a nipple.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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