Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I still have a little drunk in my system
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
