what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
