I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
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