eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
