At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
