that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
