I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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