god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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