Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
