even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
