Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
