Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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