If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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