yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
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