remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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