I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
