im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
