i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I currently don't understand fingers.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
