Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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