By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
