Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize