Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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