"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
