i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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