We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
