are you still at the devil's house?
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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