U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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