i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize