HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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