Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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