Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
