Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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