I wanna passion pit in your ass
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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