And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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