That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
