I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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