My first STD was from a foam party
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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