I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
