I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
