Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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