also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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