you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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