Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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