I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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